I was going to write about each day in a lot of detail, but then I thought about it again and figured I should just get to the point instead. Sorry, it's still pretty damn long though haha.
Months before, I planned to go to Cancun with my aunt. Knowing how she is, I was expecting to get embarrassed often (which did happen), but things worked out fine in the end. I just wanted to summarize what has happened in those past days before it escapes my memory.
Prior to Cancun, I was usually home in New York, but out on weekends, doing the same things routinely. I pretty much hated almost everyone and everything. It was as if I was drinking Hateorade daily. Many things also irritated me very easily. I was at my peak of how much stress I could handle, even though each day was practically wasted and the next day I would regret it, creating a fruitless endless cycle. November came around quickly and it was time for me to go to Cancun. I already felt a headache when my aunt said, "What's the point of bringing a camera? It's silly (In a bitch tone)." Then she stated I was bringing the "whole house" when I only had two luggages, one carry-on and another to check in and mind you, the check in one was barely full. She also had the same amount of luggage, except her check in bag was really full. It made me think, wow this trip is going to blow ass. More Here...
So I have allergies and a dry irritating sore throat right now and I guess it was a good time to experiment with lots of medicine and home remedies and torture myself. Of course, I did the tea with lemon and honey thing, but I also added sugar and later found out that actually makes your throat worse and not to have sugar (which is weird since honey has sugar). I tried Theraflu and ate a shitload of oranges...Theraflu tastes TERRIBLE and it only worked when I was drinking it. I had to literally drink it like I was taking shots. You're supposed to drink it every 6 hours, but I think one glass of that is enough torture for me to handle. Then I read that lemon also actually dries your throat more so I have been really taking lots of wrong turns. No more lemons! At night I even wrapped a scarf around my neck and went to sleep like that...When I woke up, I felt more sicker...
I went to the ginger with honey route and it works kinda well and I like feeling the burn from the ginger at my tonsils (no sarcasm). However, the next "medicine" has worked the best for me, which is drinking pickle brine! It instantly removes irritation in my throat. I don't have regular pickles so I just used green chili pickly brine and put it into my ramen, drank the soup and that irritation went away. This chili isn't hot for me at all so it felt pretty nice. It doesn't permanently cure it though...It's just temporary relief. I'm just hoping if I take enough of this stuff, it'll eventually totally disappear. Well, I ran out of soup ramen and needed more...Too bad they don't sell pickle brine alone. My mom also pickles tomato (it's actually pretty good with hot dogs) and I took the brine from that and warmed it up since this website said to...and OMG I sniffed some of it and that was really strong. I had to hold my breath and drink it, but I didn't mind the taste. I used to eat pickles alone when I was a kid! Although, this doesn't seem like a solution I could do all day.
Right now I'm just drinking ginger and honey and I'm probably going to try to keep putting chili pickle brine into my soup as much as possible. Hmmm...I sound like a freakin' weirdo haha...But I really can't stand this stupid sickness...I'm about to try the cayenne pepper and this other garlic idea. Wish me luck.
Okay, so my mom to made me (mwahaha) some clear broth soup with pickled chili with the brine and minced garlic so I could just sip on it all day and I gargled the cayenne pepper in saline water mix and voila! I feel 98% cured. I still got allergies...But yea, we'll see how I feel tomorrow.
I don't know why but I decided to revamp the layout for my nearly dead xanga haha...
Well, someone urged me to write...Someone wrote a note on facebook that I don't feel like commenting on facebook itself, but just writing about the whole thing in here. I don't know if he even knows my xanga or not, but he said that happiness is "actually finding that one person you can spend your life with" which I personally think isn't true. The problem about finding "happiness" is that what a majority of us THINK will make us happy, isn't what will actually make us happy. I used to think getting married and all those frills would be my happiness, but now I look back at it, it doesn't seem that way at all...Rather, I think being married would make me UNHAPPY. The thing that I think will make me happy is actually being somebody and being successful to myself. In other words, there is no one size fits all for a person's "long-term" happiness.
This also reminded me of the movie, "I'm a Cyborg, but That's Okay" that Neo told me to watch !! It was a cute funny movie, but the ending really broke it for me. I'm basically sort of ruining it for everyone now, but the ending basically said that the meaning of life is love. That instantly made me want to stop watching all these damn love dramas. It made me feel...Wow, what's this bullshit they're trying to feed people?! I believe that life itself is fulfilling destinies. Everything that happens, happens for a reason. Whether we live just to die, we affect someone somehow...Even if we walk around the damn block to buy some soda, it still affects the people that see you and the purchase you made at the store. It's inevitable. This love thing is total bullshit. What about people that kill themselves? They don't love anything! You can say they might be killing themselves to escape some type of emotional/mental pain and let themselves rest (sort of loving themselves that way), but that can't be for every suicidal case. Okay, I sound really bitter, but I feel that I experienced enough to really look through this whole "facade." IF I ever have kids, I'm going to make sure they don't watch happily ever afters and know reality. And as this other guy said, romantic stories are basically porno for women. It's a fantasy.
I want to add more to this, but I'm really hungry.
Also, seriously, all this thinking makes Guitar Hero so much harder for me to play!
Main reason why I haven't been updating is because once I start writing, I go back and change it, then I just end up scrapping the whole thing altogether. I still haven't really been happy lately and time is just passing by so fast.
Wth. It's already been a month since I last posted. Well, nothing new is going on. I'm still kind of a lazy ass and I got some projects coming up like bringing my onigiri dolls to life...Finally! :X And finishing up this DeviantArt game sprite ID...Gonna take a while...Here's a small preview of it:
I'm happy with it and at the same time flustered because I saw other people's work and it makes me go $%$%@%!!and want to start all over because their sprites are so dynamic and crazy looking. It's supposed to be a respresentation of yourself though and I would say that I'm not energetic at all :X *Making excuses* Also, UGH I'm seeing SOOO many different types of toe people out there (The yellow tentacle shaped forms)...It's a simple shape so I guess it's not hard to just bust it out randomly, but damn...:/ *sigh
Yes, deviantart is pretty old, but I just want to do this one project and check out depthcore more. It looks really intimidating though. They pwn my pants WAIT..wth am I doing? I'm a graphic designer! *Deletes everything @_@
Don't they realize that by making new technology smaller and smaller, it's easier to lose? Maybe that's part of the whole marketing scheme. If people lose it, they'll buy it again... because they need it.
I'm just bitter because I lost my USB drive for the kabillionth time...and for animation class nonetheless.